Earlier this week I had a small meltdown, which seemingly came out of no where.
Looking back, I can now pinpoint that it came from Facebook.
That’s right, the social network that keeps growing.
Since that little episode, I have become more aware of just how much time I spend on Facebook. Sadly, it’s much more than I lead myself to believe.
Non-Productive Perusing is what I call it.
I check Facebook while walking down the street, at stop lights, waiting in line, making meals.
It’s getting a bit ridiculous.
Back in August I challenged myself to spend only one hour each day on social media over the course of one week. Another time, I took 24 hours off from social media during a weekend trip. Sadly, those are the only times I’ve curbed my usage and that is why starting today I am instituting Less Facebook Friday.
Too Much Facebook
I’ve known about this addictive behavior for about a year now and 2014 I vow to do something about it. Facebook will not run my life, no matter how much I love technology. It’s one of my 2014 intentions (not goals) to curb my use of technology and focus more on the things that matter. Like my family, my blog and my passions. There is a time and a place for social media, strategic social engagement.
So what caused the meltdown?
A grammar school classmate posted a touching tribute to his younger brother who passed away suddenly about a year ago.
Now, I don’t even talk to this person and haven’t seen him in about 15 years, so I don’t know why it upset me so much. But, it did and sent my mind into a very depressive downward spiral.
I kept thinking about his mother, now that I am a mother, and how completely devastating it must feel to lose a child. I had a conversation with Daniel that lasted most of the day and into the next about the dark side of Facebook.
On one hand, the platform is an amazing innovation because connects us to people all over the globe, letting us into their lives and happenings. As I’ve said before, some of my best friends are people I’ve met online through Facebook or Twitter.
On the other hand, because we do see and hear so much about people (without asking for this information) we learn information that without Facebook we’d only know if we physically ran into that person on the street.
Most relationships on Facebook aren’t close enough that you’d pick up the phone and call that person if Facebook didn’t exist- right? I’d say a good percentage of my Facebook network are more acquaintances. I bet I only have 20 phone numbers in my phone contact list of friends that are also on Facebook! What is the world of personal communication coming to?
The whole day my mind kept going back to the fact that life looks so extreme on Facebook.
Or does it? Does it only look extremely positive or overly negative because we have the ability to get inside peoples daily lives like never before?
Prior to Facebook, we wouldn’t know any uber positive, or negative news unless our friends told us. Now it’s readily available and published right before our eyes in a Newsfeed.
So, does that mean life is going more to the extremes or does it only look that way because thats what people share? No one wants to share mundane status updates, because no one would care. Aren’t we all just posting so others will read it?
Which led me to another revelation about the ebb and flow of life.
Facebook Disrupts Our Impression of Life Vs. Fate
When I see amazing things happen to other people on Facebook, sometimes my brain goes into jealous mode.
When I see terrible things happen to other people on Facebook, my brain goes into panic mode.
Why? Because it reminds me how fragile we all are.
I get upset because right now, today, life is amazing.
I recognize though that it could all be taken away in a split second… and I have no control over that.
Life happens and will continue to happen.
Facebook just reminds me of the parts of life that are out of our control.
Disease, death, accidents and emergencies.
Facebook and fate make me worry more than I’d like about the future.
Usually, I pride myself on optimism and looking toward the future. Then worry creeps up (or slams me in the face) and I freak out for the future of my life, my family and specifically my son.
Somedays, I hate Facebook. Somedays, it makes me question my life and it can be depressive.
This week, I had one of those days.
Have you?
My brain became so wrapped up in the possibility of impending disaster that I couldn’t function for that entire day.
How crazy is that?
So, the next day I woke up and decided to make an effort regarding how much time I spend on Facebook. I’m cutting back and aiming for more facetime with real people.
I want to have real conversations, not Facebook-induced meltdowns about life.
